Oh, I've been told my fate practically since I was born. I think expectation's always been around. It was... nice to know what to expect, but equally frustrating for so long.
But when you're from a family of psychics it's expected.
I don't know if suffocating was the word I'd use. But it did mean a lot of how I spent most of my life was ruled by that one prediction in my fate. And it meant not being able to do certain things other people my age would do. [ a pause. ] I'm the only one in my family without those kinds of abilities. What I do is a little different, but it means I can't tell my own future. But I wanted to make it for myself.
Oh. It wasn't greatness. It was about killing someone I love.
[ to clarify. this was a thing hanging over their head for years, knowing they were destined to kill the person they loved. ]
I can always do a reading for you myself another day if you were ever curious. I can't feel the connection of the cards as well as my mom or the others, but the basic meanings come through alright.
... maybe I thought that once, but I don't now. [ and to clarify: ] I knew he would die within the year before we ever fell in love. I saw his ghost. And when we first met I couldn't stand him, but I knew his fate. I couldn't... I was always meant to be a part of it. Eventually...
[ there's a long pause like they're trying to compose themselves. ]
He asked me to. He asked me to kill him, because we needed a sacrifice to stop a demon. And it was the only way. So he died in my arms and we purged the monster of its power. [ and... it's fair to explain. ]
And then we asked for a sacrifice in return to bring him back.
... our second sacrifice worked. He came back to us. [ so it worked out even if they are slightly traumatized given what happened. and also, something they haven't said to anyone else yet. ] But I get the feeling that something happened to intervene with our sacrifice, and there's something I've forgotten now.
[ CAN BE SAID CONFIDENTLy NOW. this is actually one of the very few times he didn't get hardcore grilled/bullied for fumbling a conversation... or just had someone killed for ridiculing him. ]
You've forgotten? I know you have a lot on your plate, but this seems rather important.
It's good. Believe me, it's... very good. [ they didn't want to be without him, thank you. ]
...I don't think I realized I'd forgotten until really recently? But it feels like there are things I'm remembering that don't have a place in my memories.
About two weeks ago? [ when you bitches showed up. ] It feels as if I have memories that should be there, of a person who should be there, but I can't figure out what the memories mean or who the person might be.
[ a pause. ]
I haven't told anyone because it obviously sounds crazy.
Yeah. We had time to plan before then, but yes. [ anyway they make a face even if he can't see it. the vibe is there. ] I don't think I need to. It isn't something that would affect either of them.
Perhaps it'll be something you can resolve after this project...
[ Though he still looks kind of concerned about it. ]
If these missing memories don't give you ill feelings, then they shouldn't be forgotten. [ In his opinion. ] Or, if they aren't meant to be, then you should at least get to know what they are.
I wouldn't call them ill feelings. They're feelings I can't identify, of a... thing, or maybe a person. But it isn't a person who's here, and if I don't remember them maybe there's a reason why.
Normally, I'd say it's something you don't want to remember, but...
[ It doesn't not seem like the case here when they're actively thinking about it enough. ]
If you find that there are any changes, progress or setbacks, you're free to tell me. I won't tell anyone. Obviously. [ Just to make sure they know that. ] A solution can still be worked towards. Or at least some understanding.
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[ Fascinating, but still superstitious to him so he's like. That's neat, I guess. Maybe it's something, maybe it's nothing. ]
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But when you're from a family of psychics it's expected.
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I don't know if suffocating was the word I'd use. But it did mean a lot of how I spent most of my life was ruled by that one prediction in my fate. And it meant not being able to do certain things other people my age would do. [ a pause. ] I'm the only one in my family without those kinds of abilities. What I do is a little different, but it means I can't tell my own future. But I wanted to make it for myself.
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[ Sometimes, not all the time. ]
As you can tell, I know very little about psychics, or that world in particular.
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[ to clarify. this was a thing hanging over their head for years, knowing they were destined to kill the person they loved. ]
I can always do a reading for you myself another day if you were ever curious. I can't feel the connection of the cards as well as my mom or the others, but the basic meanings come through alright.
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fumbling like this would happen to him, though. ]
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Ever since I was little, that's what I was told. So the solution for me was to never kiss anyone, and never fall in love.
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[ Even though he's doubtful that it would be that easy. He isn't even sure if he should ask, but. ]
Did you succeed?
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No. Not at all. Not with a lack of trying, but... no.
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[ Genuinely, and he normally never apologizes. ]
Do you think it would have been better to never have known them?
[ Said quietly, like this would be enlightening to someone (to him). ]
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[ there's a long pause like they're trying to compose themselves. ]
He asked me to. He asked me to kill him, because we needed a sacrifice to stop a demon. And it was the only way. So he died in my arms and we purged the monster of its power. [ and... it's fair to explain. ]
And then we asked for a sacrifice in return to bring him back.
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That's quite a story. I'm a little hesitant to say anything positive, in the case that isn't the end or that you weren't able to bring him back.
[ HE FUCKED UP EARLIER. ]
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... our second sacrifice worked. He came back to us. [ so it worked out even if they are slightly traumatized given what happened. and also, something they haven't said to anyone else yet. ] But I get the feeling that something happened to intervene with our sacrifice, and there's something I've forgotten now.
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[ CAN BE SAID CONFIDENTLy NOW. this is actually one of the very few times he didn't get hardcore grilled/bullied for fumbling a conversation... or just had someone killed for ridiculing him. ]
You've forgotten? I know you have a lot on your plate, but this seems rather important.
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...I don't think I realized I'd forgotten until really recently? But it feels like there are things I'm remembering that don't have a place in my memories.
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he is thinking to himself... that he is so inept for this... like what in the fuck. what is NORMAL in this place? for other people? ]
How recently? And what is the nature of what you're remembering instead?
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About two weeks ago? [ when you bitches showed up. ] It feels as if I have memories that should be there, of a person who should be there, but I can't figure out what the memories mean or who the person might be.
[ a pause. ]
I haven't told anyone because it obviously sounds crazy.
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... When we arrived, then you all started your jobs officially. [ Hm. ] You haven't even talked to your fellow guardian angels?
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Yeah. We had time to plan before then, but yes. [ anyway they make a face even if he can't see it. the vibe is there. ] I don't think I need to. It isn't something that would affect either of them.
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[ Tries to narrow things down. ]
I don't think the rest of us have suffered any memory discrepancies...
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[ ...hm... ]
No, I don't think any of you have either. God would have made sure things were as in tact as possible for you.
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[ Though he still looks kind of concerned about it. ]
If these missing memories don't give you ill feelings, then they shouldn't be forgotten. [ In his opinion. ] Or, if they aren't meant to be, then you should at least get to know what they are.
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I wouldn't call them ill feelings. They're feelings I can't identify, of a... thing, or maybe a person. But it isn't a person who's here, and if I don't remember them maybe there's a reason why.
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[ It doesn't not seem like the case here when they're actively thinking about it enough. ]
If you find that there are any changes, progress or setbacks, you're free to tell me. I won't tell anyone. Obviously. [ Just to make sure they know that. ] A solution can still be worked towards. Or at least some understanding.
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