W5 PLAYER CYOA - Daigo, Eupha, Saber, Wisadel

[holyspirits]

fist fist fist fist

Comments

[rippled]

[ saber, still a worm, drinks the alpha drink!!!



but as they are simply a worm, they roll an 8 for this, which does make sense for someone who is an alpha worm. it tracks. ]

[boxcar]

It's not over yet!

[ He says, even as he becomes a puzzle-obsessed alpha worm. But y'all know what's going on. His next few rolls continue to suck ass. Wis'adel drinks him under the table for a Halo There shot contest, via a 14 v 4. He just starts crying. There's so much evil in the world... that's why he tries to party, to forget all of it... but understandable. He's learning his lesson. Maybe this contest really is the turning point of his life, and he will proceed forward from this day onwards to live an afterlife free of sin...

Who DOES know what'll happen. Not me. The worm starts coughing up little flower petals that are neon-coloured and have radical 80's patterns, representing his need and desire for a fun time. They're worm-sized. Would you rather fight 100 woerm-sized Guy Fieris, or one Guy Fieri-sized woerm? That's the debate for the day. Daigo wins this round too with a 7 v 11. Frankly at this point, this is just a sequence of you guys just bullying Satan into the ground because he is not winning at all.

The same goes for Eupha turning it up. Frankly, she should take the seat, because she clearly knows how a REAL party is supposed to go. She knocks back a Bite To Meet You with better gusto than Satan...

WHO IMMEDIATELY GOES AND BITES SABER!!! Enjoy your worm-shaped bitemark on your arm. Then it just DUNKS ITS FACE RIGHT INTO THE BIG GLASS OF ALPHA DRINK. Saber is feeling awfully not so alpha right around now. He DOES outdrink this one specifically, perhaps bolstered by the raving synth lights and music, alpha drink from earlier, and feeling compelled to bite. Maybe you just start feeling the opposite effect instead. Slightly omega.

Second round still goes to the Kung Fury Squad though. For all intents and purposes you've basically won, but maybe you want a victory lap as Satan lies on the table, sufficiently outdrank. ]

Ugggh... if you've think you've won...

[ I think you should hit him with the train. ]

[sarkazm]

Huh. You know what, you're right!

I think we can still win harder.

[BELIEVE ME I HAVE BEEN WAITING TO HIT HIS ASS WITH THIS TRAIN!!!

wiš'adel doesn't bother grabbing one of the special shots. she's just whipping out that train pass to see what happens! let's fucking go! i cast TRAIN on this worm.

her dinos are probably still around, so i think it would be pretty cool and sexy if they were also riding on the train screaming victorious dinosaur noises.]

[ugghh]

This is kind of embarrassing at this point.

[ which is rich, coming from mr. mid over here.

this is the waiting round to see if satan woerm gets hit by a train. ]

[trifocal]

[ eupha is just extremely drunk at this point and almost falls out of her seat giggling at... something. whose turn is it now? she doesn't know. ]

[rippled]

[ is saber an omega worm right now is that what that tag was saying ]

[boxcar]

[ For some reason, when Wis'adel whips out that golden pass, the music track changes. And a HUGE vapourwave portion opens up from the far end of Hell.




And a massive train just comes in and BLASTS Guy Fieri. It's definitely one of those cartoonish moments where a person just gets fully OBLITERATED and you have no idea what the hell happened to them. It doesn't even matter. There's a slight awkward silence.

AND THEN A LOUD SERIES OF CHEERS AND HOOTINGS!! All 10,000 rats are cheering, the arcade machine is firing off lasers that explode into digital fireworks in the sky, Richie sorry I mean the TRUE HACKER is giving each and every single one of you a whooping high-five.

One of these cars is straight up the shoe car you saw from earlier. Someone is in it. He comes out to greet you. It's a new police chief who was appointed in the absence of Jing Yuan. Don't worry about that guy. ]

Excellent work, gang. Thanks to you guys, Donk City is safe from Satan and his ridiculous party schemes.
Now let's get you all home.

[ Also yeah you're an omega worm I guess. ]

REWARDS

[boxcar]

[ Wow, uh. You guys sure went through something, didn't you. How the hell are you going to explain any of this?

Anyway, you can get into the train (something draws you to the shoe car) and get taken back to where you're from, still coming off the high of your epic party bash. At some point along the ride home, the post-party clarity kicks in and your Kung Fury delusions wear off slowly...

You get to keep a couple of your souvenirs though!

Tuskpir
(A shaped friend...)
A little guy. Maybe he can eat some of your bad dreams for you.

Train Ticket
(This is the will of the weak!)
Summon a miniature toy train to pile-drive someone to moderately heal them of an injury (small wounds, left-over bruises/scars, etc).

Pipe Bomb
(You think you're hot shit?)
It's a pipe bomb. It's about a person-sized explosion.

Lucky Coin
(Wish on a 50/50.)
Feeling uncertain or unlucky? Flip the coin and leave it to fate (get a small boost of luck/reroll one dice if the situation calls for it).

You may decide amongst yourselves who gets what.

Additionally, even though you're sane (?) again, you feel a constant urge to reply to things unprompted with FUCK YOU or a middle finger. Alternatively, if you want to be polite, you can keep compulsively making absolutely terrible puns, or hallucinate viral pop-ups in your vision. This will last just until before trial begins.

Thanks for playing!!!...something... anyway watch Kung Fury. ]