Audience- Yoji Uruha

[holyspirits]

Comments

[holyspirits]

Yeah. I don't have their abilities at all, so it's the only way I can. [ pausing at another shop to browse. this time it's little seashell creations. ]

Part of why I said yes when God asked was because it didn't feel like much of a difference to what I was used to before.

[kumeyuri]

[also pauses to browse.]

Not content to sit idly on your hands even in Heaven, huh?

[holyspirits]

Who could be? I'd never thought much about it before I came here, but if religions back home are to believed heaven is supposed to be quiet and immaculate. Wouldn't you get bored with nothing new to do after a while?

[kumeyuri]

[he's silent for a bit because he has conflicting answers to this. on one hand, he thrives off being useful? on the other hand, years of depression doesn't give a shit, and also he didn't have a choice. but anyway.]

Yeah, it does get pretty boring.

[holyspirits]

[ . . . ]

If you disagree, you can say so. [ they are observant about these things, and they are more likely to speak up than let it slide. sorry. ]

[kumeyuri]

I don't disagree. [...] I've just learned to appreciate that "boredom" can be a luxury sometimes, I guess.

[holyspirits]

[ they think about where uruha's from, and they pause. ]

Because sometimes it means that at least you're safe? [ if you have time and room to be bored, it means you don't have to be so on guard. ]

[kumeyuri]

Something like that. I don't mind danger for myself, but these things don't exist in a vacuum.

[he's used to doing nothing. years of not wholly willing seclusion does that. it was for everyone's good, his own included, so he never resented it, but ultimately, it was also a gilded cage and glorified house arrest with no timeline for when he'd be free. if he wasn't so checked out of his life anyway, it'd have been torturously dull on paper. not allowed to leave, not allowed to have any contact with the outside world.

... and yet there's a lot he'd give to go back to that time, spending every day with the same people, the same familiarity. back when they were all still alive.]

[holyspirits]

[ hm... they ponder on this because it does, actually, make sense. ]

I don't disagree. But the same can't be said about anything. Outside factors have a way of dismantling even the best scenarios. Even if I can see this place feeling like a vacuum anyway.

[kumeyuri]

Yeah. [simply,] Nothing lasts forever, and nothing is guaranteed.

[holyspirits]

If it were... how would you feel about something like that? In a perfect world.

[kumeyuri]

Honestly, I can't even picture it.

[he came out of the war much more well-adjusted than some (samura), but there's probably still some lowkey damage + losing contact with his lodestone, and when you've spent half your life like that you forget what genuine stability ever felt like.]

[holyspirits]

I'd say maybe that's a thing to reflect on while you're here, but it's not for everyone. It might even be harder to try. But... what else do you have but time here?

[kumeyuri]

Aren't I supposed to be reflecting on my sins here?

[holyspirits]

[ i miss the yaoi magnet... :( ]

You don't think you can accomplish both at the same time?

[kumeyuri]

[not the yaoi magnet]

Personally, I prefer to carry out my life through meaningful, external action.

[holyspirits]

Then enlighten me on your first meaningful, external action here. Do you have a plan?

[kumeyuri]

[a sigh]

All right, I get it, I get it! But to be frank, I'm not interested in dreaming about a hypothetical perfect world over the one actually in front of me.

[holyspirits]

And what if what you dreamed could become a reality? Even if it isn't perfect, maybe there are parts you could still figure out how to have back.

[ they are not an optimist, and they know there are things in this world that people won't always get returned, but... small things, even, could make a difference. ]

[kumeyuri]

I already have things in the present to fight for. They're more important to me right now than any dream.

[uruha can't even fathom how the next ten minutes of his life would go if he returned to life, let alone one day more, when any semblance of stability has been completely and utterly scorched and the ashes scattered to the wind.]

[holyspirits]

[ this is very jan of you, jan. ]

... what needs to happen for you to win those fights then?

[kumeyuri]

[CEASE.]

For the enemy to die, for starters.

[unfortunately, things have become complicated about who the "enemy" is.]

[holyspirits]

... they can die, can't they?

[kumeyuri]

Unless they've obtained the secret to immortality, then yeah, they're only human. The problem is that they operate in secrecy.

[holyspirits]

Well that's annoying. [ they just say this, as if it doesn't irritate them that that's the problem. ] And even if you find them, they'll find other ways to continue operating in secret, won't they.