holyspirits (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
holyspirits) wrote2025-03-16 05:01 pm
holyspirits) wrote2025-03-16 05:01 pmW5 PLAYER CYOA - Daigo, Eupha, Saber, Wisadel
fist fist fist fist
holyspirits) wrote2025-03-16 05:01 pm
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[reasons you shouldn't put weesh at the top of the order: this. she stalks up to the desk to also slam her hand down on it.]
We've got interdimensional cats, alien rave freaks running around trying to shoot people-- [a gesture at the dismembered alien arms she's got-] and you're worried about our property damage?!
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[ @ the police chief general: ] We'll get it handled. Although she does have a point, the issue is a bit bigger than some property damage...
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Yes... I believe this city is under threat from something not of this place or time. If left alone, the cost will be far greater than you can imagine.
I wish to ask for backup with what will be a very advanced and delicate hacking endeavour...
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Don't I always fix everything? Trust me. [ said too confidently. ] But it is as she says, we need the help of that person.
[
they know who this person is but francy does not. ]
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Well, maybe if you showed up at work on time, you out of control, off the books -- hold on. You don't work here?
[ like he's just realizing this. okay. anyway, he turns to the other three, straightening. ]
You're right. We've discovered an antimatter particle trace leak in the bionic gamma-wave thrusters of the space time continumum. [ yes he says it like that, that's not a typo. ] The party demons are causing chaos in the streets, and I'm assigning you all this case to track down the source. It's getting out of hand fast. I'll get you in contact with the True Hacker.
[ and he picks up a phone, giving saber a little salute.
anyway, you're right, this IS their right as kung fury. saber grabs a bunch of papers on the desk to look through them, and finds a lot of bills and documents talking about the damage done to the city. it also gives you a name for your target, as you find a bounty for thirty billion double dollars for someone known as SATAN, THE ULTIMATE PARTY GUY. ]
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[she doesn't work here. she's just going to be nosy and try to lean over saber's shoulder to see what these papers say.]
You guys get us all to that source, and let's get this shit handled.
[maybe this will even be the answer to dealing with her nemesis, that tool.]
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[ good thing kung fury is like 30cm shorter so daigo can just lean over to see these files too. ]
...Now I understand what that rat guy was saying about the hell party.
[ do you daigo. do you really. ]
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The malfunctioning arcade machine also mentioned "party" and "hell"...
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This is going to need all of our expertise.
[ they're not sure how dinosaur expertise will fit in but like. it's fine. ]
Once we defeat Satan, the city will forget all the property damage.
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that does seem to be the goal, though, when saber mentions it. maybe if you defeat satan, the city will be safe! surely satan is the one sending the party demons to earth. that guy sucks.
anyway, as you're looking at these papers, the chief is on the phone. ]
Hello? Yes, this is the police. I need you to put me in contact with - what?
[ there's a very loud, booming voice on the other end of the line. ]
Huh?
[ and then you all hear FUCK YOU! SEE YOU IN HELL! and there's the sound of gunshots.
not over the phone, i mean there are gunshots in this room because there are now bullets coming out of the phone. BLAM BLAM BLAM! someone joked about the chief falling asleep after his spiel, and you were right, because he gets shot in the head and falls over dead behind his desk. the eternal sleep...
so now there's a phone, which is floating in midair and just wildly spraying bullets across the police station. holy shit! maybe roll to dodge? or figure out what you're doing with this. ]
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[we rolled EXACTLY THE SAME so idk about you francy but i think that she and saber should do this awesome synchronized dodge away from the phone and split off in different directions opposite from each other. somehow. it's not THAT cool with our 14s but it's still pretty neat...
anyway if bullets can go out of the phone obviously they can go into the phone? she's going to be trying to manage to grab it so that she can just fucking shoot back down the phone line. fuck you.]
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she freezes like a deer in the headlights and takes a bullet to the shoulder. and just falls right over in shock. ]
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they will go and check on triceracops... try to stop the bleeding... ]
Come, this is not a place for a dinosaur to die.
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wis'adel leaps into action. she's correct in the logic that if this thing can shoot, then she can shoot back! she unloads her machine gun into the floating phone, and it staggers backwards dramatically. it takes a very long time for it to collapse entirely, but. with several holes punched through it, it drops to the ground on top of the police chief, and battery acid leaks out of it... it has been defeated.
the thing about this place is physics are kind of wacky. i think daigo is the only one who might feasibly know what a video game is outside of this universe, but regardless - it is like video games. eupha gets shot and it does hurt like fuck, but you're surprisingly okay! you've lost a bit off your health bar, but a well-placed bandage or some mystery herb liquid that you could dump all over your hands would probably help out here. they've gotta have a first aid kit somewhere in the station. still, congrats on that bullet in the shoulder.
still, daigo, with your 2, you are just absolutely riddled with bullets and it feels like you've gotten run over with a truck. no... triceracops... is this the end? is this your game over, kiwami and sonic & knuckles 2?
fortunately for you, saber slides down to the ground. it is not daigo's time, it seems, because the power of having your partner give you a one-liner is enough to make all those bullets clatter out of your wounds like they're ashamed to be there. again. hurts like a bitch, but nothing an herb won't fix.
you must be so glad to have saved your partner this time, saber, after the terrible fate that befell your ment-ner... perhaps maybe having a partner isn't so bad after all? or maybe it is. this is the danger of a vigilante cop life - you never know who you might lose next... ]
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[get it. because it's a phone. fuck you, bullet phone.
she leaves it collapsed dramatically on the police chief's body, turning to check on the others and-- oh, shit, they're not doing so hot? triceracops... your holes...]
... c'mon, we're gonna need to patch you two up and get going. Sounds like somebody must be trying to stop us from getting to this hacker.
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with the power of partnership, and kung fury's overwhelming protagonist aura, daigo is able peel himself off the ground. his poor aching prehistoric bones though. his everything. owie. ]
There should be a health kit around here somewhere. [ ... ] Hackerwoman, are you alright...?
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Yes... I believe so. I think we must treat your wounds, first of all.
[ a sad look at their dead chief... but they have a mission they must complete. ]
There must be another way to reach them.
[ she'll look around the office for a health kit, relevant memo, or a phone book. maybe they're in the yellow pages. ]
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once they have determined everyone is alive, saber will also search for any items that will be helpful... they are trying not to think too much about the highs and lows of having a partner, the highs being these really touching moments, and the lows being death.
actually is there anyone else at the police station they can go and ask?? ]
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anyway, you guys give the area a good search down. there are a lot of dead people out in the lobby because of the gun phone, but again, the police totally respawn in real life so you're not very worried about this. you manage to find a pack of herbs that will help you be less full of holes! there's a pretty decent supply in here, so if you're ever in need of something to stop the bloodloss or if a limb needs to be reattached, you can just toss one of these badboys in your mouth and chomp away. it'll fix what ails ya.
other things you can find include police badges and batons, and there's this whole room full of contraband goods that you can just take. nobody's looking, and you are the law now. there are no other guns back there, but there's knives and drugs and keys to motorcycles and stuff like that. you may take one crime item, if you wish, and turn it into a crusade for justice.
in this search you also go through the chief's desk. there actually is a yellow pages in there, which is a thing i haven't thought about in thirty years. there's a listing for THE TRUE HACKER - wow, they really are just right there and easily contacted. must be hard times.
will you call them? ]
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this is a short one from me because my food is here and also, like, calling the true hacker is probably up to hackerwoman over there? sorry, she's going to be busy with this.]
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since he already has a GLOCK he doesn't need contraband. he's set here.
wow this is also a short tag as we put the burden of phone calls on our poor eupha. although daigo will also offer her an herb. ]
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if someone picks up she will suddenly realize that doing this while chewing is a mistake and mumble awkwardly as she tries to quickly finish it. ok. well. time to recover this. ]
Is this the True Hacker? The city needs your help.
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they will then walk over to where eupha is in case the hacker would like to hear the voice of something they'd be able to recognize as police. ex police. whatever. ]
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the person on the other end of the line is using a cool decoder voice when they speak. ]
1 533, 1 533 411. y0u 423 41113d w17h 7h3 14w.
h3110, my y0un9 f3110w h4ck32... 7h3 c17y 15 1nd33d 1n 720u813. 1 7h1nk 1 kn0w h0w 70 h31p. m337 m3 47 7h353 c002d1n4735.
[ and the True Hacker will beam coordinates into your heads. for a moment, you see Reality. you see the matrix laid out in front of you, rushing past you in zeroes and ones. and then it's gone. all four of you now instinctively know how to get to the True Hacker's lair. it's across town! ]
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