historicals: (61)

[personal profile] historicals 2025-03-05 06:59 pm (UTC)(link)
[ mmm.... ]

It would be very difficult for me to do so, for a variety of reasons... I have always been under constant watch - and the few friend I have made in Convallaria Town are now, as well.

[ there's a beat. ] Ah...but, my dear friend, you aren't. For what it is worth - I appreciate it, Gamaliel. Truly.

[ it's sweet, for her to try to run through this situation for solutions, for what is a desperately hopeless place to be - he smiles, and it's not stressed or anything by it, but genuinely touched. ] I've not really had anyone to ever try to fight for me before, until very recently. So... I am thankful. I just wish it was easier to solve.
configurer: (Maddie_PSD (69))

[personal profile] configurer 2025-03-06 03:43 am (UTC)(link)
Nothing worth fighting for is ever easy. [ this isn't said in an optimistic way, more kind of a resigned tone ] But you can't just accept going back and being locked away again. What's the point of life if you are?

[ he could like. stay in heaven. that is an option. ]
historicals: (68)

[personal profile] historicals 2025-03-06 04:07 pm (UTC)(link)
[ what's the point of life, indeed? what a great question. ]

... This life of mine is pointless already. [ his death, in the grand scheme of things, was just pointless, too. ] But... perhaps I can finish my book, at least. If nothing else, I will be watched closely - I will not be able to make it as comprehensive as I would have ever liked, but... maybe there are some truths I can reveal. And maybe that is the only difference I could ever really make.

[ ... ]

I have learned that the more that I run from my fate, the faster it catches up to me.
configurer: (Maddie_PSD (125))

[personal profile] configurer 2025-03-06 05:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Forget fate. Your choices are your own. [ there's something a little spiteful in how she says that. ] I know how it feels to think your life is pointless, but it's not. You can't just write yourself off like that.
historicals: (54)

[personal profile] historicals 2025-03-06 07:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[ but what if you've never had any choices? he doesn't say that, but it's the truth. he's never been allowed to make them. heaven is the most freedom he's ever known. coward. you can't even fight for yourself.]

... thank you, Gamaliel. [ quietly. ] And...I'm sorry, that that's a feeling that has crossed your heart - it is an awful way to be.

[ to feel pointless. ]

I... have not yet lost all hope. [ but boy is he getting close to it! haha yay bad end. ] So, I will do the best that I can to make the right choice. Whatever that choice may be.
configurer: (Maddie_PSD (163))

[personal profile] configurer 2025-03-07 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
It's fine. [ very quick and dismissive ] I was a teenager, which is honestly the stupidest age to be.

[ she looks 15. ]

I'm going to be blunt, Taair. I don't think locking yourself away is the right choice. I know there's more to it than that, but it sounds like that kind of sacrifice would just delay the inevitable anyway.
historicals: (15)

[personal profile] historicals 2025-03-07 02:16 am (UTC)(link)
[ hmm. well yes see that's important and gams is saying wise things but consider let's talk about gamaliel instead ]

...When you were actually a teenager?
configurer: (Maddie_PSD (65))

[personal profile] configurer 2025-03-07 02:27 am (UTC)(link)
Huh? [ oh right. ] Oh, yeah. Ages ago. This is just the form I chose to take. For ... reasons.
historicals: (58)

[personal profile] historicals 2025-03-07 02:29 am (UTC)(link)
[ eyebrows raising ]

....reasons?
configurer: (Maddie_PSD (111))

[personal profile] configurer 2025-03-07 03:30 am (UTC)(link)
Reasons. [ repeating it ] It's hard to explain. I guess the short of it is that this is the age the idiot I'm in love with knew me best as. And he never got to grow up past that age.
historicals: (7)

[personal profile] historicals 2025-03-08 03:08 pm (UTC)(link)
[ nooo.... ]

...I'm sorry for your loss.
configurer: (Maddie_PSD (164))

[personal profile] configurer 2025-03-09 05:01 am (UTC)(link)
It's... [ hm. ] It's not okay, and it wasn't for a long time, but it's not anything to feel sorry for anymore.