[NOT ME FINISHING THIS TAG AND THEN JUST LEAVING IT HERE FUCKING HELP ME. Anyway Koharu can look... and she can find! Wow, not even having to roll a d20 for it. Isn't it nice here? No having to fight overly-hard for anything!
Though the coin is still located on the ground in between several people who are absolutely not looking where they're stepping. Howmst will she retrieve coin...
Meanwhile, Siffrin is socially struggling. Oh Siffrin. Elysia just looks amused...]
Are you sure? Well, these ones aren't very sweet, so maybe it'll make a good match for you after all.
[As she goes to flag the shopkeep down, Lucas will make his way over with a smile. AND THEN A LAUGH... Though it's a light one, slightly amused.]
It's very lovely to see you, too, as always. I really ought to get home, but why don't we meet the next time you're free? I hear the new cafe serves a wonderful breakfast.
[ A good match, sure... Listen, this is why everyone else does the talking, and Siffrin mostly just listens. Can remember a voice teasing them, saying they are the definition of taciturn. Yeah, that sums up Siffrin in a nutshell. ]
I'm sure, El. It's a heartfelt gift from you nevertheless, so I'd be happy with it.
[ Genuine warmth. But whew, they can recompose themselves from being too silly in the company of Lucas. They nod, offering a smile at that thought. ]
Definitely. I'll be sure to free up my schedule, Lu.
[Richie's struggling out here, he's not blessed with the good fortune of the gods like these two are...
Anyway! The people will kind of glance at Koharu and pretty much move aside without any fuss! That's nice. One or two even apologize for being in the way. She can pick up the coin easily! Though when she does so, she'll notice something strange reflecting in the surface for a brief moment. It's like a window into another world, a brief flicker of a glimpse into a reality where Uruha's bleeding out and empty-eyed, Aki is lying still and cold, Marcoh is reaching out as though to try to help her - or stop her, maybe? But it's a there and gone thing.
Well, that's fine, probably. Best get that coin back to Richie!
Back with Siffrin, Lucas just nods, offering a small smile and reaching out to pat their hatted head gently.]
I'll look forward to it, dear. Please don't stay out too late, alright?
[As he walks off, they'll notice that - oh! Yeah, wow, huh. The sun's basically setting and the vendors are busy beginning to pack their wares away. The crowd has thinned out a bit, but that's normal at this hour. That's all fine; nothing's too unusual here. Time does get away from a person sometimes, you know.
Elysia comes back over from the stand with a little bag, which she offers to Siffrin.]
Here we are—sweets for the sweet. [And as she hands it out, she'll lean in to give them a lil hug and says, teasingly:] Don't eat it all at once, okay?
[ Koharu reaches down, lifts up the coin, and... freezes.
It flashes by in an instant, however—too quick to properly register. She blinks once, twice, then shakes her head to slip out of her daze. There's a little less pep in her step as she eventually decides it's time to return, but she does, lifting the coin to Richie in the palm of her hand. ]
Here—I got it back quick. Are you sure you looked hard enough...?
[ A patpat. Argh, their cheeks tint with a blush, embarrassed but they allow it. They're used to it from their old tutor, after all. Offers a small wave and takes in their surroundings... oh, yikes. Yeah, it did get really late. They really should wrap up this delivery and get started towards home probably.
But sweet Elysia is back, and they offer her a small smile before taking the offered bag. A nod, even if they emit a pitched sound at the words. Compliments, they will Not get used to though.
Leaning into the hug naturally, juggling their things on one arm as their free arm wraps around before they freeze. ]
I - I'll try not to. [ THEIR BIG APPETITE. That for some reason never made sense to them? Oh well, nothing to worry about. They offer her a small wave goodbye and (aki voice) FINALLY... they will step over to the venders to try and pass one of them Uruha's delivery. ]
Sorry this took so long, but I was asked to leave this for you from Uruha.
[KOHARU JUST OUT HERE ROASTING THIS MAN. Richie at least has the sense to look sheepish as he takes his coin. Thanks...]
I swear, I looked up and down the place and couldn't see a thing! Maybe your eye's just keener than mine.
[Hm. Maybe! Well, he goes and buys his goods and then comes back to give one of his pastries to Koharu.]
Thanks for the help. Make sure you get inside before it gets too dark, you hear?
[But with that and a wave, he heads off. Gooby!
Elysia also just waves and sets off once her gift has been accepted, joining the people trailing slowly but surely away from the closing stands. As they (me voice) FINALLY approach the counter, one of the shopkeeps blinks and looks over from where they're packing away their wares.]
Oh - Uruha? Thanks! I forgot he said he'd be swinging by with something today. Here--
[Siffrin gives away one bag of apples and gains one bag of baked goods, which the person slides over the counter and toward the two of them.]
But this is normal? It's so normal? Everyone is so kind. As if they'd expect anything else right? They dip their head in return. ]
It's no problem, really... Anytime. Thank you.
[ aaaa But okay they're done. Whew, Isabeau is always much better to send off for errands. Ever so social, friendly and loud. But that's okay. Because they can run into familiar faces like this. Siffrin can turn, peer around for Koharu, then smile as he sees her and joins her. ]
It's gotten pretty late, sorry about that. Ready to leave? I'll take you back first.
But honestly, it is probably not that abnormal for them. The people here are kind, and these two are well-loved. Vendors stop and wave at them as they pass, packing up their belongings for the day. Maybe they'll catch a few familiar faces on their way home.
Will sweet Siffrin walk Koharu back and go home, or are there any swerves from the plan on this fine night? ...Oh! It is night now, huh. As they walk away from the market, the sky overhead is turning from its sunset shades into the darker blue and purple right before the sky goes black and the stars come out, but that's not unusual, either.]
BUT AWAY THEY GO... Returning to their homes! Parting for the night! No sudden detours, nothing jarring happens, because why would it? This is the ideal, after all. Despite the whispering of danger, neither of them run into it. Despite the little glimpses of sadness that sometimes flicker in, it's all manageable.
So. They return to their own homes. What do these ideal nights of theirs look like? Who is waiting for them when they open their doors and tuck themselves away for the evening?
Siffrin returns to family - a family that loves them, that cherishes their bonds, that remembers all of the moments they had spent together up to this point. Which faces greet them? Do they stay awake a little longer, chatting and enjoying a cup of tea together? Do they swap stories, do they talk about their days, do they enjoy a meal shared over a messy, chaotic table, full of warmth and laughter? Where does Siffrin's beautiful life take them in the moments before their head hits the pillow in a room that's entirely and comfortably their own?
Koharu returns to a family, as well. A perfectly peaceful, perfectly ordinary, perfectly lovely family in a house that's cozy and comfortable and just enough. What does her evening look like? Does she talk to her parents over a home-cooked meal? Is there a cherished family pet she plays with? A loved one she calls, just to hear their voice at the end of a long day? What do these last and lovely moments in this beautiful day take her in the moments before she tucks herself away into a room perfectly suited to her and her comfy, cozy bed?]
[ As soon as Siffrin comes home, Isabeau's face is who greets them first. Bright, happy, cheeks a little flushed as he excitedly welcomes them home. Siffrin's own cheeks are warm themselves. Mirabelle joins almost immediately after, just as excitable, asking how everything was. Oh but come inside, take a seat, she'll pour everyone tea! Odile ruffles their head as they come by, teasing about how popular Siffrin must be with everything that they're carrying.
Their chatter goes on a bit late, enjoying tea, sharing their days. Isabeau and Mirabelle kind enough to set some food aside for him. Even as Siffrin showers them all with the rest of the bouquet. Flowers are to prove how important someone is, after all. How much they cherish these connections and bonds. Siffrin fills their conversations with laughter and jokes, Isabeau's boisterous laughter filling the room with Odile's complete utter flat face over how terrible they are, and sweet Mirabelle tries to pretend they aren't good, but a hand covers her mouth to hide her snorts.
When they finally go to sleep, its in a room that they all share together. Because they're family. And Siffrin likes having their family close. Separate beds, of course. With Odile's ever quip of an old lady like herself needs a bed to herself. Even though she's hardly that much older even if her time does draw near. He might stay up a bit later than them all, they all sleep at reasonable hours. He'll stay up until four am and sleep until noon if they allow him to. But eventually he'll go to sleep, letting that warmth lull them to peaceful rest. ]
[ I'm going to be so real, I want to write a fluffy and wholesome introspective comment like zetsu's but my brain is SO fried after the kind of day I had, so I will say: the answer to every question is yes, Koharu had such a wonderful day in her beautiful perfect life that she's able to go to bed as happy and #blessed as ever.
And tomorrow will be an equally perfect day, surely! ]
Well. Their perfect tomorrow doesn't come just yet, exactly.
Siffrin enjoys their evening and drifts off in the company of their family, warm and cozy. They fall into a slumber, and in that slumber, they dream. It's an awful dream. In this dream, they are a traveler in a distant land with no memory of their past, trapped in a revolving loop of failure after failure and death after death. The precious family they built in Arpechele comes crumbling down over and over again. Mirabelle, Odile, Isabeau; they all die in so many horrific ways. No matter how hard Siffrin tries to save them, they can't, and their own mind and sense of self fractures further in the process.
They dream of another lifetime, too. One where Elysia was taken from them too soon, a bright light that left behind soft memories and sweet letters and little else. Where Lucas, whose hand rested atop their head so warmly, died alone in a church for his crimes, and they could do nothing but part ways. Where Uruha, who had barely begun to see the value in himself beyond his duties, was forced to kill again and again, more weapon than human. Where Siffrin themself struggles so badly under the weight of loss and failure and crushing loneliness not only from the time they were alive, but from the time after their death, as well.
Koharu, likewise, drifts off into slumber and dreams - more nightmare than dream, really. She'll dream of a lifetime in which she didn't spend much of it on herself, focusing instead on others. Keeping her eyes outward. Never looking at those directly near her - not until it was far too late. She dreams of a confession come too late, of a death come too quickly. A lifetime that she lived in, but was also strangely absent from.
She dreams of another lifetime, too. In this dream, Marcoh cannot stand to be held or touched or faced with kindness, fraying at the edges after weeks and weeks of crushing weight. Uruha takes on albatross after albatross, trying to press onward with all the sharp edges of the sword he's been made to be. Richie is full of a biting anger and deep exhaustion, unable to cope with the loss. Koharu herself has witnessed terrible carnage, bloodshed, misery - seen people falling apart, seen gruesome scenes that would feel right at home in a horror movie. She has suffered from great loss, and even knowing a reunion is on the horizon doesn't dampen the pain of it.
They seem to get the sense within this dream that what they're looking at here could be—might be—frighteningly real.
Do they choose to wake up into a hellish, painful reality? Or would they rather keep enjoying this sweet and blissful sleep?]
[ I'm feeling an Anais in this chili's tonight, in that I won't take too long but.
Something feels wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong. It would be so nice to continue a sweet and blissful sleep, wouldn't it? But when faced with a nightmare, one that feels too real way too real what else is there to do but try and wake up?
[They wake up... into a haze; not quite dream, not quite sleep. They can recall the nightmares they just witnessed as clearly as if they were looking back on their own memories, but they recall their lives here in Arpechele clearly, too. Perhaps the nightmares seem a bit more real, but the soft and peaceful lives they currently lead are surely much more tempting. The ultimate determining point lies within their own hearts.
Can they bear to let this opportunity go? Are they willing to sacrifice everything they could ever want - peace, love, family, history - to return to a reality that hurts so badly, where the mistakes they've made will come right back to haunt them? Do they think they deserve to stay here, to enjoy this perfection that may not even be earned?
Now, they have a clearer choice to make.
Do they choose to give up the true lives they led, filled with pain and suffering, to live a perfect life where all of their needs and wants are met, but they will never have the chance to fix their mistakes?
Or do they choose to give up the soft dream, returning to that agony and pain they know awaits, but creating an opening to forge ahead and perhaps do better, be better, even if the way ahead is difficult?
[ That part almost comes too easily. Do they think they deserve to stay here? To enjoy a perfection that may not even be earned? No. Of course not. If it wasn't reached by their own hands, but given to them, then clearly they don't deserve it. Why should they think otherwise?
It's tempting. Wishful thinking. Having everything there, ready to grip and hold onto.. but it'll ultimately slip from their hands one day, won't it? What's real? And what isn't? (ARE YOU EVEN REAL??)
They.. have to do better, don't they? They have to. They.. should. Give up that wishful dreaming. ]
There's no fixing what happened, no rewind button that would ever make life return to how it was; merely working with a miracle of a second chance she's been giving, but with an uncertain a future as ever.
Koharu would never call herself strong or brave. She second guesses herself at almost every turn. How could she return to something that feels so cruel and harsh when she could easily retreat into tranquility?
She doesn't give up this dream—not right now. She doesn't believe she has the courage to do so. ]
[It's tempting, isn't it? Siffrin's already done so much hard work. Would it really be that bad if they allowed themself this? If they took the "easy" out? Their actions may have harmed others, and may have harmed himself, but should that really, truly bar them from reaching out for something good? Even if it comes easily, does that really mean it wasn't earned?
But if they're staunch in their decision, they can leave it all behind. If the guilt weighs on them that heavily, they can sever the ties to this comfortable but false life and awaken to reality.
Koharu chooses to remain within the dream, and who could blame her, really? When tranquility is what awaits her, and the harshness of reality beckons so cozily, who would choose to return to it?
She can enjoy this beautiful dream for some time, then. She can wake up again and go to the market. She can see Aki and have a cute date, sharing a parfait from the new cafe and enjoying one another's company and time without anyone else interrupting them or Koharu feeling as though she has to place her attention anywhere else. She can worry about simple things, easy things, like what new apples to bake her desserts with or whether or not she has enough rock sugar leftover from her last market run. She can talk to Uruha, to Marcoh, to Richie, to Siffrin, to all of her friends and her loving parents however much she wishes.
She can enjoy a peaceful life in the daytime, and sometimes her nights are peaceful, too. But every so often, she'll have those nightmares again. They always ask the same question.
Will you stay within this dream, or will you awaken to reality?
She will be asked this question three more times, days and then weeks apart. In between, she can enjoy her sweet and lovely life. There are only occasional blips of discomfort - the ghostly image of a person she loves, dead. The sound of a metal beam crashing to the ground. Blood on her palms when she goes to fix her hair, there and then gone. They do ramp up a bit the longer she chooses to remain within the dream, but not overly much. It is still ultimately a beautiful, lovely life.]
[ Comments so it's here but no, sever those ties. A sinking feeling that.. allowing themselves this, it feels almost wrong. (Why? Why can't something good for them happen for once?)
Something about the Universe. It... leads. The guilt is a lot. Heavy. Heavy heavy. Everything is suffocating. But they will still aim to sever.
Since when has suffering been more familiar than anything else? ]
[ She keeps having the dreams and the blips in reality where something looks horribly wrong. Perhaps it isn't constant, but it's enough that over time it leaves her questioning even in the moments of peace.
[Siffrin can sever their ties sooner, and Koharu later. The end result is the same, really. Siffrin awakens from the nightmare into their bed, and the other three in their room are there sitting with them. Each member of their precious family, all here to see them off.]
You're really gonna head out, huh? [From Isabeau, who looks sad in a kind of tired way, but offers little else by way of resistance. Mirabelle reaches for their hands to hold, her expression one of familiar concern.]
Oh, Sif... It's going to be really hard out there. I don't know how you do it—how you're going to do it.
[Odile reaches out last, setting a hand atop their head briefly.]
The decision's set, though, so there's no coming back. Try not to have any more regrets.
[With Koharu, she gets to enjoy a bit more time within the dream. She gets to live this peaceful lie, and the ghosts that inhabit this false world with her don't at all condemn her for choosing to do so. But when she finally decides that enough is enough and it's time to break the ties, Aki turns to face her, sighing, dropping whatever conversation they'd been in the middle of having like an actor breaking through the fourth wall.]
So. I guess this is goodbye, then. Even if it was just for a little while, was it a good dream, at least? I think you deserve that much. ...Love you, Koharu. Don't forget it, okay?
[Maybe they do deserve a little rest, a little peace. Maybe they don't. Maybe the guilt from the mistakes they've made and can't undo outweighs their desire to keep living a life unearned, or maybe it's just the discomfort of holding onto a sweet lie even as the bitter, painful truth continues trying to break in.
With the choice made, the world fades around the two of them, taking their ideal homes, their peaceful lives, and their friends, family, and loved ones along with it. In the blackness that follows, they smell smoke, fire. Looking down, they're standing in the field of burning lycoris noirges. The flames rise up, engulfing them quickly and sending them to where they need to be.
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holyspirits) wrote2025-03-23 07:03 pm
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Though the coin is still located on the ground in between several people who are absolutely not looking where they're stepping. Howmst will she retrieve coin...
Meanwhile, Siffrin is socially struggling. Oh Siffrin. Elysia just looks amused...]
Are you sure? Well, these ones aren't very sweet, so maybe it'll make a good match for you after all.
[As she goes to flag the shopkeep down, Lucas will make his way over with a smile. AND THEN A LAUGH... Though it's a light one, slightly amused.]
It's very lovely to see you, too, as always. I really ought to get home, but why don't we meet the next time you're free? I hear the new cafe serves a wonderful breakfast.
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Well, Koharu will approach and gently announce: ]
Excuse me, I just need to grab something that fell real quick.
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I'm sure, El. It's a heartfelt gift from you nevertheless, so I'd be happy with it.
[ Genuine warmth. But whew, they can recompose themselves from being too silly in the company of Lucas. They nod, offering a smile at that thought. ]
Definitely. I'll be sure to free up my schedule, Lu.
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Anyway! The people will kind of glance at Koharu and pretty much move aside without any fuss! That's nice. One or two even apologize for being in the way. She can pick up the coin easily! Though when she does so, she'll notice something strange reflecting in the surface for a brief moment. It's like a window into another world, a brief flicker of a glimpse into a reality where Uruha's bleeding out and empty-eyed, Aki is lying still and cold, Marcoh is reaching out as though to try to help her - or stop her, maybe? But it's a there and gone thing.
Well, that's fine, probably. Best get that coin back to Richie!
Back with Siffrin, Lucas just nods, offering a small smile and reaching out to pat their hatted head gently.]
I'll look forward to it, dear. Please don't stay out too late, alright?
[As he walks off, they'll notice that - oh! Yeah, wow, huh. The sun's basically setting and the vendors are busy beginning to pack their wares away. The crowd has thinned out a bit, but that's normal at this hour. That's all fine; nothing's too unusual here. Time does get away from a person sometimes, you know.
Elysia comes back over from the stand with a little bag, which she offers to Siffrin.]
Here we are—sweets for the sweet. [And as she hands it out, she'll lean in to give them a lil hug and says, teasingly:] Don't eat it all at once, okay?
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It flashes by in an instant, however—too quick to properly register. She blinks once, twice, then shakes her head to slip out of her daze. There's a little less pep in her step as she eventually decides it's time to return, but she does, lifting the coin to Richie in the palm of her hand. ]
Here—I got it back quick. Are you sure you looked hard enough...?
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But sweet Elysia is back, and they offer her a small smile before taking the offered bag. A nod, even if they emit a pitched sound at the words. Compliments, they will Not get used to though.
Leaning into the hug naturally, juggling their things on one arm as their free arm wraps around before they freeze. ]
I - I'll try not to. [ THEIR BIG APPETITE. That for some reason never made sense to them? Oh well, nothing to worry about. They offer her a small wave goodbye and (aki voice) FINALLY... they will step over to the venders to try and pass one of them Uruha's delivery. ]
Sorry this took so long, but I was asked to leave this for you from Uruha.
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I swear, I looked up and down the place and couldn't see a thing! Maybe your eye's just keener than mine.
[Hm. Maybe! Well, he goes and buys his goods and then comes back to give one of his pastries to Koharu.]
Thanks for the help. Make sure you get inside before it gets too dark, you hear?
[But with that and a wave, he heads off. Gooby!
Elysia also just waves and sets off once her gift has been accepted, joining the people trailing slowly but surely away from the closing stands. As they (me voice) FINALLY approach the counter, one of the shopkeeps blinks and looks over from where they're packing away their wares.]
Oh - Uruha? Thanks! I forgot he said he'd be swinging by with something today. Here--
[Siffrin gives away one bag of apples and gains one bag of baked goods, which the person slides over the counter and toward the two of them.]
Thanks for your work.
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But this is normal? It's so normal? Everyone is so kind. As if they'd expect anything else right? They dip their head in return. ]
It's no problem, really... Anytime. Thank you.
[ aaaa But okay they're done. Whew, Isabeau is always much better to send off for errands. Ever so social, friendly and loud. But that's okay. Because they can run into familiar faces like this. Siffrin can turn, peer around for Koharu, then smile as he sees her and joins her. ]
It's gotten pretty late, sorry about that. Ready to leave? I'll take you back first.
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But honestly, it is probably not that abnormal for them. The people here are kind, and these two are well-loved. Vendors stop and wave at them as they pass, packing up their belongings for the day. Maybe they'll catch a few familiar faces on their way home.
Will sweet Siffrin walk Koharu back and go home, or are there any swerves from the plan on this fine night? ...Oh! It is night now, huh. As they walk away from the market, the sky overhead is turning from its sunset shades into the darker blue and purple right before the sky goes black and the stars come out, but that's not unusual, either.]
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But yes, Siffrin will absolutely walk Koharu back home. SHE IS SO TIRED AND EEPY. Doesn't pay attention too much to the changing shades. ]
Take care of yourself, okay Koha? Good luck the next few days!
[ A gentle pat on her head before yeah, they will head home, too. No sudden detours! Family awaits... :pleading: ]
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The end of the day is nigh... woooo. ]
Thanks for coming along, Siffrin! I'll make it up to you later!
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BUT AWAY THEY GO... Returning to their homes! Parting for the night! No sudden detours, nothing jarring happens, because why would it? This is the ideal, after all. Despite the whispering of danger, neither of them run into it. Despite the little glimpses of sadness that sometimes flicker in, it's all manageable.
So. They return to their own homes. What do these ideal nights of theirs look like? Who is waiting for them when they open their doors and tuck themselves away for the evening?
Siffrin returns to family - a family that loves them, that cherishes their bonds, that remembers all of the moments they had spent together up to this point. Which faces greet them? Do they stay awake a little longer, chatting and enjoying a cup of tea together? Do they swap stories, do they talk about their days, do they enjoy a meal shared over a messy, chaotic table, full of warmth and laughter? Where does Siffrin's beautiful life take them in the moments before their head hits the pillow in a room that's entirely and comfortably their own?
Koharu returns to a family, as well. A perfectly peaceful, perfectly ordinary, perfectly lovely family in a house that's cozy and comfortable and just enough. What does her evening look like? Does she talk to her parents over a home-cooked meal? Is there a cherished family pet she plays with? A loved one she calls, just to hear their voice at the end of a long day? What do these last and lovely moments in this beautiful day take her in the moments before she tucks herself away into a room perfectly suited to her and her comfy, cozy bed?]
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Their chatter goes on a bit late, enjoying tea, sharing their days. Isabeau and Mirabelle kind enough to set some food aside for him. Even as Siffrin showers them all with the rest of the bouquet. Flowers are to prove how important someone is, after all. How much they cherish these connections and bonds. Siffrin fills their conversations with laughter and jokes, Isabeau's boisterous laughter filling the room with Odile's complete utter flat face over how terrible they are, and sweet Mirabelle tries to pretend they aren't good, but a hand covers her mouth to hide her snorts.
When they finally go to sleep, its in a room that they all share together. Because they're family. And Siffrin likes having their family close. Separate beds, of course. With Odile's ever quip of an old lady like herself needs a bed to herself. Even though she's hardly that much older even if her time does draw near. He might stay up a bit later than them all, they all sleep at reasonable hours. He'll stay up until four am and sleep until noon if they allow him to. But eventually he'll go to sleep, letting that warmth lull them to peaceful rest. ]
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And tomorrow will be an equally perfect day, surely! ]
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Well. Their perfect tomorrow doesn't come just yet, exactly.
Siffrin enjoys their evening and drifts off in the company of their family, warm and cozy. They fall into a slumber, and in that slumber, they dream. It's an awful dream. In this dream, they are a traveler in a distant land with no memory of their past, trapped in a revolving loop of failure after failure and death after death. The precious family they built in Arpechele comes crumbling down over and over again. Mirabelle, Odile, Isabeau; they all die in so many horrific ways. No matter how hard Siffrin tries to save them, they can't, and their own mind and sense of self fractures further in the process.
They dream of another lifetime, too. One where Elysia was taken from them too soon, a bright light that left behind soft memories and sweet letters and little else. Where Lucas, whose hand rested atop their head so warmly, died alone in a church for his crimes, and they could do nothing but part ways. Where Uruha, who had barely begun to see the value in himself beyond his duties, was forced to kill again and again, more weapon than human. Where Siffrin themself struggles so badly under the weight of loss and failure and crushing loneliness not only from the time they were alive, but from the time after their death, as well.
Koharu, likewise, drifts off into slumber and dreams - more nightmare than dream, really. She'll dream of a lifetime in which she didn't spend much of it on herself, focusing instead on others. Keeping her eyes outward. Never looking at those directly near her - not until it was far too late. She dreams of a confession come too late, of a death come too quickly. A lifetime that she lived in, but was also strangely absent from.
She dreams of another lifetime, too. In this dream, Marcoh cannot stand to be held or touched or faced with kindness, fraying at the edges after weeks and weeks of crushing weight. Uruha takes on albatross after albatross, trying to press onward with all the sharp edges of the sword he's been made to be. Richie is full of a biting anger and deep exhaustion, unable to cope with the loss. Koharu herself has witnessed terrible carnage, bloodshed, misery - seen people falling apart, seen gruesome scenes that would feel right at home in a horror movie. She has suffered from great loss, and even knowing a reunion is on the horizon doesn't dampen the pain of it.
They seem to get the sense within this dream that what they're looking at here could be—might be—frighteningly real.
Do they choose to wake up into a hellish, painful reality? Or would they rather keep enjoying this sweet and blissful sleep?]
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Something feels wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong. It would be so nice to continue a sweet and blissful sleep, wouldn't it? But when faced with a nightmare, one that feels too real way too real what else is there to do but try and wake up?
Wake up wake up wake up. ]
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She wakes up. ]
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Can they bear to let this opportunity go? Are they willing to sacrifice everything they could ever want - peace, love, family, history - to return to a reality that hurts so badly, where the mistakes they've made will come right back to haunt them? Do they think they deserve to stay here, to enjoy this perfection that may not even be earned?
Now, they have a clearer choice to make.
Do they choose to give up the true lives they led, filled with pain and suffering, to live a perfect life where all of their needs and wants are met, but they will never have the chance to fix their mistakes?
Or do they choose to give up the soft dream, returning to that agony and pain they know awaits, but creating an opening to forge ahead and perhaps do better, be better, even if the way ahead is difficult?
It seems neither answer is right nor wrong.]
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It's tempting. Wishful thinking. Having everything there, ready to grip and hold onto.. but it'll ultimately slip from their hands one day, won't it? What's real? And what isn't? (ARE YOU EVEN REAL??)
They.. have to do better, don't they? They have to. They.. should. Give up that wishful dreaming. ]
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There's no fixing what happened, no rewind button that would ever make life return to how it was; merely working with a miracle of a second chance she's been giving, but with an uncertain a future as ever.
Koharu would never call herself strong or brave. She second guesses herself at almost every turn. How could she return to something that feels so cruel and harsh when she could easily retreat into tranquility?
She doesn't give up this dream—not right now. She doesn't believe she has the courage to do so. ]
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But if they're staunch in their decision, they can leave it all behind. If the guilt weighs on them that heavily, they can sever the ties to this comfortable but false life and awaken to reality.
Koharu chooses to remain within the dream, and who could blame her, really? When tranquility is what awaits her, and the harshness of reality beckons so cozily, who would choose to return to it?
She can enjoy this beautiful dream for some time, then. She can wake up again and go to the market. She can see Aki and have a cute date, sharing a parfait from the new cafe and enjoying one another's company and time without anyone else interrupting them or Koharu feeling as though she has to place her attention anywhere else. She can worry about simple things, easy things, like what new apples to bake her desserts with or whether or not she has enough rock sugar leftover from her last market run. She can talk to Uruha, to Marcoh, to Richie, to Siffrin, to all of her friends and her loving parents however much she wishes.
She can enjoy a peaceful life in the daytime, and sometimes her nights are peaceful, too. But every so often, she'll have those nightmares again. They always ask the same question.
Will you stay within this dream, or will you awaken to reality?
She will be asked this question three more times, days and then weeks apart. In between, she can enjoy her sweet and lovely life. There are only occasional blips of discomfort - the ghostly image of a person she loves, dead. The sound of a metal beam crashing to the ground. Blood on her palms when she goes to fix her hair, there and then gone. They do ramp up a bit the longer she chooses to remain within the dream, but not overly much. It is still ultimately a beautiful, lovely life.]
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Something about the Universe. It... leads. The guilt is a lot. Heavy. Heavy heavy. Everything is suffocating. But they will still aim to sever.
Since when has suffering been more familiar than anything else? ]
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Still... Is this what reality is supposed to be?
That can't be right. No thank you. ]
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You're really gonna head out, huh? [From Isabeau, who looks sad in a kind of tired way, but offers little else by way of resistance. Mirabelle reaches for their hands to hold, her expression one of familiar concern.]
Oh, Sif... It's going to be really hard out there. I don't know how you do it—how you're going to do it.
[Odile reaches out last, setting a hand atop their head briefly.]
The decision's set, though, so there's no coming back. Try not to have any more regrets.
[With Koharu, she gets to enjoy a bit more time within the dream. She gets to live this peaceful lie, and the ghosts that inhabit this false world with her don't at all condemn her for choosing to do so. But when she finally decides that enough is enough and it's time to break the ties, Aki turns to face her, sighing, dropping whatever conversation they'd been in the middle of having like an actor breaking through the fourth wall.]
So. I guess this is goodbye, then. Even if it was just for a little while, was it a good dream, at least? I think you deserve that much. ...Love you, Koharu. Don't forget it, okay?
[Maybe they do deserve a little rest, a little peace. Maybe they don't. Maybe the guilt from the mistakes they've made and can't undo outweighs their desire to keep living a life unearned, or maybe it's just the discomfort of holding onto a sweet lie even as the bitter, painful truth continues trying to break in.
With the choice made, the world fades around the two of them, taking their ideal homes, their peaceful lives, and their friends, family, and loved ones along with it. In the blackness that follows, they smell smoke, fire. Looking down, they're standing in the field of burning lycoris noirges. The flames rise up, engulfing them quickly and sending them to where they need to be.
Back to Hades with you, sinners.]