Halloween? It's a day once a year where people dress up in costumes, eat way too much candy and find all sorts of ways to scare people and themselves. People use it as an excuse for everything spooky.
[ puts a witch hat on him. they are standing on their toes to do this. ]
Thought I'd ask just because it seemed like everyone was very busy yesterday. Lots of activity.
[ they tilt their head a little as if modeling them for him, but ultimately they will leave them there. they think it's funny. ]
I think so. Nothing that happens here will reach your own world unless you choose to tell people when you return, so why not try what you can? Being dead doesn't exactly mean you should stop living.
[ this is a poor way to phrase it, but they know yves will understand their point. they also allow for the handholding, this is fine. they... know how yves feels about love, and it's for that reason they aren't directly teasing him about it. all bets are off the table for everyone else. ]
It's a complicated thing. Love. I think it probably feels differently for everyone, so even trying to explain why you might miss it won't always make sense to everyone you talk to. But as long as you know what you're feeling, maybe that's what matters.
well yves will just reach to talk zuriel's hand afterward as they keep walking around because affection week has not stopped for yves and in fact it will only get worse ]
Mm... yeah. I think so. I feel a little bad because I think it might've been confusing for Adolphe but... it's probably easier that it happened with Adolphe than anyone else.
[ just best friend buddy pal things... ]
I hope that when romance blooms for people here, it can be something a little more real.
[ this is fine, they are good with holding hands, even if it feels faintly familiar in a way they can't pinpoint. and different in a way they can. ]
Oh? [ oh god, are they going to have to deal with two men who have feelings for each other and are very clearly avoiding it... again... ] What makes you say that? I don't disagree, I would hope romance is a little more real, but at the same time romance can come from so many unexpected places. Some people might even start out despising the person they come to love most.
Adolphe knows everything about me, including how badly I want to be loved. We're very close already, so I think it's easier than dealing with the embarrassment of suddenly being very intimate with a near stranger.
[ like one you live with... jiaoqiu and bas he is still rooting for you... maybe furry yaoi can be real... ]
But I think that's true! It comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes... Maybe after seeing all these sudden twists, I'm just hoping for something genuine. It'd be sweet!
... I guess it's easier to be yourself and even be in love with people you're already close with. Even if in this case the love wasn't real.
It's still early, give it time. People's feelings need to develop for it to be genuine, and lately things have been a little chaotic. But I think there are certain situations that can easily push people closer together.
[ this is all just observations and also zuriel talking in general, they assume yves will have his own opinions regardless. ]
If you're sure. I think being in love has a tendency to sneak up on people, too. One minute you're just friends, and the next you realize how pathetic you are about trying to sneak handholds in the car where nobody can see you.
[ OKAY. ]
Is it out of greed wanting to see what love looks like, or is it wanting people to be happy because you know love feels nice?
I wouldn't worry about that. [ they are aware it's very telling, but this is not about them! ]
Is that what I'm doing? [ perhaps... ] I know you believe you're selfish about this, but I also don't think there's anything wrong with wanting people to be with other people.
... dating someone, and then dating their best friend comes with certain complications, and that includes trying to be subtle while deciding how to tell them.
[ MOVING ON. ]
Tell me about your connections? Who's been your favorite so far?
I think you can love everyone a little big, but there has to be some people you love a little more than others. There's nothing wrong with having preferences.
Mmm... but I guess you're right. I do love Adolphe and Monsieur Lucas in a way that's been built up over the years... but I also love Marcoh for the way that he's so reliable, and his actions speak far louder than words. I love Claude for the way that he tackles big ideas without hesitation, and helps the most difficult topics be clearer for me. Ellie, for her bright spirit and affectionate ways that make the whole room brighten. Anders' passion and vulnerability, Shadowheart's slow but gradual openness, Monsieur Richie's infectious laughter....
That's not even getting me started on the three of you.
It's... [ they aren't going to go into it unless he asks, actually, so they wave a hand like it's a stupid topic and focus on what his answer is. ]
... I'll never really understand how you think of yourself as selfish when it comes to loving people when you have different reasons for everyone. I feel like a person who is self-serving wouldn't be able to identify the differences.
[ hmmmmmmmmmmm he's so curious but he's also distracted ]
... well, I do love people with the hopes that it'll lead to someone who one day loves me. I don't know if any of these people will... even if sometimes I get a little hopeful.
[ because they've been kind about his scar and his mask, and aren't afraid of all the things that he carries with him ]
I don't think there's anything wrong with having hope. [ that's the immediate answer. ] Who would we be without that? Maybe they will, and maybe they won't, but being open to the possibility is a big challenge. And I think it's brave to keep having that hope.
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What's this holiday anyway, Zuriel?
But I'm feeling good. [ amused: ] Why are you asking?
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[ puts a witch hat on him. they are standing on their toes to do this. ]
Thought I'd ask just because it seemed like everyone was very busy yesterday. Lots of activity.
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Sounds fun! We didn't have all these holidays on the island, but they all sound like a blast...
[ THIS ISLAND HAD NOTHING. but yves laughs a bit... ]
I'd say so. It seems like everyone was falling in love... so I just hope no one was hurt too badly.
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We have a lot of them where I'm from, but not everyone celebrates them. At least here you get to experience a little of everything.
[ but there's a hum to that. ]
It was temporary, wasn't it? I think everyone's likely too embarrassed to be hurt, but... I imagine at the time it felt nice at the time.
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I guess that is what heaven should be like, right? Trying out things you haven't gotten to in life but would enjoy.
[ so that's not bad. but also once yves is done putting the head piece on, he'll reach to hold onto zuriel's hand and give it a little squeeze ]
... it did. [ and zuriel knows how he feels about love, so he doesn't have a problem admitting it ] To feel loved, for even just an hour.
[ it makes his heart ache, even if it doesn't trigger his full insanity since it wasn't real ]
... but I can see why people miss the feeling when it's gone.
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I think so. Nothing that happens here will reach your own world unless you choose to tell people when you return, so why not try what you can? Being dead doesn't exactly mean you should stop living.
[ this is a poor way to phrase it, but they know yves will understand their point. they also allow for the handholding, this is fine. they... know how yves feels about love, and it's for that reason they aren't directly teasing him about it. all bets are off the table for everyone else. ]
It's a complicated thing. Love. I think it probably feels differently for everyone, so even trying to explain why you might miss it won't always make sense to everyone you talk to. But as long as you know what you're feeling, maybe that's what matters.
[ how it made you feel at the time, at least. ]
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well yves will just reach to talk zuriel's hand afterward as they keep walking around because affection week has not stopped for yves and in fact it will only get worse ]
Mm... yeah. I think so. I feel a little bad because I think it might've been confusing for Adolphe but... it's probably easier that it happened with Adolphe than anyone else.
[ just best friend buddy pal things... ]
I hope that when romance blooms for people here, it can be something a little more real.
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Oh? [ oh god, are they going to have to deal with two men who have feelings for each other and are very clearly avoiding it... again... ] What makes you say that? I don't disagree, I would hope romance is a little more real, but at the same time romance can come from so many unexpected places. Some people might even start out despising the person they come to love most.
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Adolphe knows everything about me, including how badly I want to be loved. We're very close already, so I think it's easier than dealing with the embarrassment of suddenly being very intimate with a near stranger.
[ like one you live with... jiaoqiu and bas he is still rooting for you... maybe furry yaoi can be real... ]
But I think that's true! It comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes... Maybe after seeing all these sudden twists, I'm just hoping for something genuine. It'd be sweet!
[ MAN LOVES LOVE SO MUCH ]
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... I guess it's easier to be yourself and even be in love with people you're already close with. Even if in this case the love wasn't real.
It's still early, give it time. People's feelings need to develop for it to be genuine, and lately things have been a little chaotic. But I think there are certain situations that can easily push people closer together.
[ this is all just observations and also zuriel talking in general, they assume yves will have his own opinions regardless. ]
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I know Adolphe loves me, and I do love him. I don't think we're in love, though.
[ he does not know what problems he is about to cause adolphe for the next few weeks but nevermind that ]
That's true, though... I guess I'm just being greedy...
[ to see LOVE oh to have an ic shippusher ]
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If you're sure. I think being in love has a tendency to sneak up on people, too. One minute you're just friends, and the next you realize how pathetic you are about trying to sneak handholds in the car where nobody can see you.
[ OKAY. ]
Is it out of greed wanting to see what love looks like, or is it wanting people to be happy because you know love feels nice?
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this is so funny tho. yves is laughing ]
Any chance you're speaking from experience or witness testimony?
[ he offers up both options because he's not sure where zuriel's curse about love starts, but still.... ]
... the latter, but I do know you're reframing it to be kinder...
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Is that what I'm doing? [ perhaps... ] I know you believe you're selfish about this, but I also don't think there's anything wrong with wanting people to be with other people.
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[ but he's clearly just teasing, tone light. they can move on if zuriel doesn't want to linger ]
Ahaha... I guess not. I just like seeing the connections that people make... I know I feel fortunate for the ones I've made already.
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... dating someone, and then dating their best friend comes with certain complications, and that includes trying to be subtle while deciding how to tell them.
[ MOVING ON. ]
Tell me about your connections? Who's been your favorite so far?
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Zuriel....
[ hehehEHEHE GOSSIP
but he just smiles in return ]
Favorite...? That's hard. I love everyone at least a little bit, you know?
[ he TRULY loves everyone disgusting little shit ]
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I think you can love everyone a little big, but there has to be some people you love a little more than others. There's nothing wrong with having preferences.
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[ truly so affectionate ]
Mmm... but I guess you're right. I do love Adolphe and Monsieur Lucas in a way that's been built up over the years... but I also love Marcoh for the way that he's so reliable, and his actions speak far louder than words. I love Claude for the way that he tackles big ideas without hesitation, and helps the most difficult topics be clearer for me. Ellie, for her bright spirit and affectionate ways that make the whole room brighten. Anders' passion and vulnerability, Shadowheart's slow but gradual openness, Monsieur Richie's infectious laughter....
That's not even getting me started on the three of you.
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... I'll never really understand how you think of yourself as selfish when it comes to loving people when you have different reasons for everyone. I feel like a person who is self-serving wouldn't be able to identify the differences.
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... well, I do love people with the hopes that it'll lead to someone who one day loves me. I don't know if any of these people will... even if sometimes I get a little hopeful.
[ because they've been kind about his scar and his mask, and aren't afraid of all the things that he carries with him ]
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I don't think there's anything wrong with having hope. [ that's the immediate answer. ] Who would we be without that? Maybe they will, and maybe they won't, but being open to the possibility is a big challenge. And I think it's brave to keep having that hope.
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... I'll try to be brave and hold onto that hope.
It's just a little hard sometimes.
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[ squeezes their hand ]
So I think I'm still getting used to the idea that maybe next time could be different.
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