she's just like damn........... politics bro....... ]
... Those in the lower class have no way of seeing the bigger picture playing out. They don't know the steps you're taking and the goals that you work towards.
[ In implication that he doesn't think it's that important, but it's coming from a guy who abandoned his past selves for whatever identity he deemed better... And once upon a time his advice was simply to forget all the bad things.
Because likely it's how he dealt with his childhood that he strategically claims to not remember. ]
I suppose they say that you have to understand your mistakes or you'll repeat them again. But not everyone's past is hard to look at because of mistakes. Sometimes it was just bad luck. And once you understand any mistakes you did make, spending more time thinking about them will just make you said without benefit.
That's right. Some things can't be undone and looking at them won't change that it happened. You can be too late to learn from those mistakes. [ i give you another one as they keep trying to find an exit. ] I'm also dead—the only thing I can hope for... Is that one day I can apologize.
[ Sometimes you have given up on yourself as a person, but at the very least you want to make amends. ]
and yeah. That is also funny she is techy but no filter. He massages his temples, like he's fighting a migraine, before dragging his hand down his face. ]
Because everything comes with a price and I thought... It was worth it.
[ Because the voices are talking to him in his head. One is unrepentant, a proper lord, who cares about results. The other who is the better version of himself, admonishing him. ]
It doesn't matter. It led me here. Worthless to the very end.
Sometimes hard decisions are necessary. I don't know enough about the circumstances.
[ because the thing is. she has also tried to get results at the expense of someone else's life? a memory plays out on the mirrors, from 33:52 to 35:25. ]
It does. So long as you believe that those who upload still have consciousness. That people like myself have consciousness. Then... it's still possible to die.
... I don't know if I'm the person for that kind of question since I'm not learned. [ To be a techy. ] But you feel all that people should, don't you? Nothing less.
That's right. Even when I had neural algorithms for emotions that didn't quite match the world yet, I still felt those feelings. Just in a slightly different way.
No one is born the same, so it would make sense that it would be different for you, even if I don't quite understand your circumstances.
[ Since like... His best friend is aromantic which he won't know that's the word for it, then he knew another girl who had the opposite of anhedonia (is this hedonia).
Sometimes you simply just are. ]
... Even if you had less, that wasn't your choice. I think.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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she's just like damn........... politics bro....... ]
... Those in the lower class have no way of seeing the bigger picture playing out. They don't know the steps you're taking and the goals that you work towards.
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How many times do I have to see these fucking memories.
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I'm sorry that you're having to relive something unpleasant.
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[ WHY IS HE CURSED WITH BAD ONES because i play him ]
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[ but, ]
I suppose the few I've seen haven't been... good, necessarily. But they've helped me to understand the person they belonged to.
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It makes me feel a bit better if that's the case... But then these mirrors are a double-edged sword.
[ UNDERSTANDING... AND RELIVING TRAUMA? ]
I don't want to look back at them.
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Do you think that it's possible to overcome your past without facing it?
[ this is a sincere question and she's not trying to lead him to any specific answer. ]
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[ In implication that he doesn't think it's that important, but it's coming from a guy who abandoned his past selves for whatever identity he deemed better... And once upon a time his advice was simply to forget all the bad things.
Because likely it's how he dealt with his childhood that he strategically claims to not remember. ]
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I suppose they say that you have to understand your mistakes or you'll repeat them again. But not everyone's past is hard to look at because of mistakes. Sometimes it was just bad luck. And once you understand any mistakes you did make, spending more time thinking about them will just make you said without benefit.
[ now she is just thinking out loud. useless. ]
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[ Sometimes you have given up on yourself as a person, but at the very least you want to make amends. ]
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anyway this memory sure takes a fucking turn. and she has no filter, so she just asks: ]
... Why did you do that to her?
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and yeah. That is also funny she is techy but no filter. He massages his temples, like he's fighting a migraine, before dragging his hand down his face. ]
Because everything comes with a price and I thought... It was worth it.
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[ Because the voices are talking to him in his head. One is unrepentant, a proper lord, who cares about results. The other who is the better version of himself, admonishing him. ]
It doesn't matter. It led me here. Worthless to the very end.
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I suppose it must be hard to judge if the outcome would have been worth it if you weren't even able to reach your goal.
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... Shouldn't you be abhorred? Results shouldn't cost the lives of people you cared for.
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[ because the thing is. she has also tried to get results at the expense of someone else's life? a memory plays out on the mirrors, from 33:52 to 35:25. ]
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every time he gets a techy memory, i find it so funny. ]
... This situation is... Complex. [ With the whole tech medium, but... ] Yet death hangs over the same.
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It does. So long as you believe that those who upload still have consciousness. That people like myself have consciousness. Then... it's still possible to die.
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... I don't know if I'm the person for that kind of question since I'm not learned. [ To be a techy. ] But you feel all that people should, don't you? Nothing less.
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That's right. Even when I had neural algorithms for emotions that didn't quite match the world yet, I still felt those feelings. Just in a slightly different way.
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[ Since like... His best friend is aromantic which he won't know that's the word for it, then he knew another girl who had the opposite of anhedonia (is this hedonia).
Sometimes you simply just are. ]
... Even if you had less, that wasn't your choice. I think.
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