And then something happened that probably changed your entire outlook, and you found yourself on a slippery slope you weren't able to reverse on your own, because your hands was already tied.
[ a guess, maybe. but gabriel shrugs again. ]
Having the opportunity to stop doesn't mean you're in the right position to do it at the time. Circumstances matter. The people you're around matter. I had plenty of chances to stop some of the things I'd done, too, and didn't really feel like I was making a change until about the time I found myself here. And now here you are with a second chance anyway.
... It's strange. [ There's a weak smile, confused. ] I've never had anyone who tried to understand, or even sympathize.
[ That he was in a tough position and that all that had happened? He didn't mean it to, he wasn't expecting.
In the end, this doesn't mean that he has changed his mind about his lot in the grand scheme of redemption and damnation. Just that... This is a strange moment to have and he doesn't know what to do. Already, he thinks he doesn't deserve it. ]
... does it make you uncomfortable? [ they're not going to stop questioning it and talking through it, but they are kind of getting a gauge on how jacopo thinks. ] I think sometimes it's probably hard to know what you think about things you aren't used to.
[ Because he has forgotten what it's like... Honestly, he has forgotten what it's like to interact with people without parading a mask, which is funny because he's putting one on still while he's here.
He knows he should accept it graciously, with gratitude. It's still just a shape to him. ]
[ it's just you and me in this bar, bucko. and gabriel doesn't seem to mind if jacopo doesn't know what to do with it, that he doesn't know how to accept it or what to say. they can at least acknowledge it is likely this isn't even the whole story, because when you are so deeply entrenched in your own misery and the things that have fallen upon you it's hard to even begin to undo the damage. ]
I'm not gonna force you to receive it. [ first of all. ] But... there's nothing you can say to me that's going to make me take that back either, pretty sure. And it's not going to change what I say going forward either.
no subject
[ Now that isn't the case, obviously. However, yeah, he wasn't always like this. He used to be a regular person.
His expression does become complicated. Maybe there was a tinge of hope. ]
... How do you know that? [ Says the man who doesn't have the confidence or the faith in himself to not bite again. ] I had every opportunity to stop.
no subject
[ a guess, maybe. but gabriel shrugs again. ]
Having the opportunity to stop doesn't mean you're in the right position to do it at the time. Circumstances matter. The people you're around matter. I had plenty of chances to stop some of the things I'd done, too, and didn't really feel like I was making a change until about the time I found myself here. And now here you are with a second chance anyway.
no subject
[ That he was in a tough position and that all that had happened? He didn't mean it to, he wasn't expecting.
In the end, this doesn't mean that he has changed his mind about his lot in the grand scheme of redemption and damnation. Just that... This is a strange moment to have and he doesn't know what to do. Already, he thinks he doesn't deserve it. ]
no subject
... does it make you uncomfortable? [ they're not going to stop questioning it and talking through it, but they are kind of getting a gauge on how jacopo thinks. ] I think sometimes it's probably hard to know what you think about things you aren't used to.
no subject
It does.
[ Because he has forgotten what it's like... Honestly, he has forgotten what it's like to interact with people without parading a mask, which is funny because he's putting one on still while he's here.
He knows he should accept it graciously, with gratitude. It's still just a shape to him. ]
I don't know how to receive it.
no subject
I'm not gonna force you to receive it. [ first of all. ] But... there's nothing you can say to me that's going to make me take that back either, pretty sure. And it's not going to change what I say going forward either.
no subject
It won't be my fault when you find yourself with regrets.
[ Down his whole drink. ]
no subject
[ so they will remain here as a confidant so long as they can. ]
Refill, or are you cutting yourself off early?
no subject
[ WHY ARE YOU BEING OMINOUS towards kindness. Anyway. ]
This won't be enough, so no.
[ we can wrap up, though. ]