obdure: (pic#17647845)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 03:42 am (UTC)(link)
[ Appears, hello. What are even the vibes here? He just wanted to check on him after today.

He comes over to his side.
]

Evening, Gabriel.
sixam: (These feelings I feel inside)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
[ uh. the vibes are extremely bad. mostly just the kind of "held together by a thread" type of anxiety and just a weird sense of isolation and frustration. and stress, but what else is new. ]

Hey. [ a drag from the cigarette. ] ... how are things?
obdure: (pic#17647862)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
[ His appearance changes, blotted like watercolors before his twenty-two appearance fades bit older. Now he's in a black dress shirt, red tie, and pin-striped trouser pants. With a cigar in hand, he breathes in the smoke and it almost gives the scent of fermented tobacco that would make you think billiards and gambling.

All visuals, though.
]

Not that different from before, but... I wanted to check in. Big reveal for you.
sixam: (There's a room)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 04:42 am (UTC)(link)
[ watching... very curiously, just trying to soothe his own vibes into something neutral as this manifests in front of his eyes. honestly? fair. ]

Figured it was fair. Good idea, or bad idea?
obdure: (pic#17647838)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 05:29 am (UTC)(link)
[ smoking solidarity..... even though it's bad for you, jonas. ]

Rather than good or bad, it's a necessary step... You've built some rapport already, so it may have soften some of our edges which is good.
sixam: (Nothing ever lasts forever)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 05:56 am (UTC)(link)
Pretty sure some of my rapport actually crashed because I'm now part of the problem, but I get your point. For other people, it may have softened the edges.

[ ...thinking about monday... ]

... I feel like garbage. [ since jacopo asked him to tell him things, he will start with that. ]
obdure: (pic#17647830)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 06:39 am (UTC)(link)
Pros and cons. I know it may seem duplicitous for you to have stayed quiet for long... But If you established yourself early, the uproar and files of complains may make you lose your mind earlier. It might be harder to build rapport, too. Possibly impossible for some.

[ But logistics... Of what they can't change. He thinks overall this was a decent welcome.

he pats his back.
]

I know.
sixam: (It doesn't matter)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 07:26 am (UTC)(link)
Jacopo, I hate to tell you this but I lost my mind way before I died, so. I don't know if I would've noticed the difference. [ he's just being shitty about it, but also he has not exactly been coping well in general.

the wings flutter a bit under the pat. ]


... I also know you're saying this because of what's happened to you, and obviously I appreciate the insight. I always have.
obdure: (pic#17647861)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 07:54 am (UTC)(link)
Then that would make both of us, wouldn't it. It doesn't mean you can't be driven mad again as you've seen already with some of us.

[ Okay, little shit (gentle). Remember how everyone bit each other (not as nice). ]

Regardless of my background, you're in an overall sympathetic position, but... It is part of it.
sixam: (Can't hold me back)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 08:30 am (UTC)(link)
[ he's thinking about lucas without saying or actually thinking about lucas. ]

Also a fair point. [ another drag. ] ... I don't really know what I'm doing. I've never been a god before.
obdure: (pic#17647746)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 09:07 am (UTC)(link)
[ Jacopo just thinks Lucas is that way always. He is unaware of the substance abuse... There is no fixing that Catholic. Takes a long drag because Man. ]

I don't think many people have... It's—a tall order is an understatement.
sixam: (Shattered glass and black holes)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 09:10 am (UTC)(link)
[ help. that's fair... that's fair. ]

... I feel like an idiot for agreeing to this. But this is my job now, so I don't really have time to think about that part. Zhongli gave me some good advice, and I agree with it, but it also doesn't fix the mistakes already made.
obdure: (pic#17647791)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 09:30 am (UTC)(link)
You are an idiot for agreeing to this.

[ Just says it, I'm sorry. But he is also here to be supportive... in his support, he wouldn't want to wish anyone god. Thankless ass job. ]

It doesn't, no. You'll just have to apply what you learned next time. There's no changing the past, but there's the present and future.
sixam: (There's no turning back)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 09:41 am (UTC)(link)
I still have no idea if I want to do this project again in the future. Maybe a different variation, but... it's been a lot.

[ anyway thanks? shut up. ]

... I know it was stupid to take this job. But God told me he'd help me with something I wanted. Accepting a role in the project came first. Being God came second.
obdure: (pic#17647845)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 05:49 pm (UTC)(link)
It's ambitious, but I see the potential in it... If Heaven and Hell are dictated by absolute systems, then it overlooks factors that are out of a person's control. No one chooses the environment to be born—it's an unfortunate truth that no one is born equal.

Maybe some parts of this project can be lifted.

[ And can be made efficient in the future. Who knows. He won't. ]

... So... Basically, you moved up ranks unexpectedly?
sixam: (Holding hands)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 06:04 pm (UTC)(link)
That's the thing, yeah. I don't like how rigid the system is. That was what the whole point of this project was, and then things went sideways really fast thanks to this thing that snuck in from hell. But I didn't have enough power to figure it out soon enough and stop it.

[ hm... ]

I think it's... God and I talked about the project. I agreed it was a good idea and it was worth pursuing. And in agreeing, I apparently agreed to be the new God because if I could do this effectively I could find the answers I wanted from the Old God in the first place. I didn't know retirement was on the table, or that they'd be unreachable, or how much would be left unsaid. But I probably should have, because gods are never forthright.

[ and maybe I'm no better for keeping this a secret for so long. ]
obdure: (pic#17647792)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-03 06:35 pm (UTC)(link)
[ help................... help.................. he's massaging his temples ]

... Did you ask god about what it all entails before accepting? Or did you just. Not get a chance.

[ Jacopo has heard enough about deities that he wouldn't be surprised if they just fucked off. ]
sixam: (This war and peace inside my mind)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-03 08:00 pm (UTC)(link)
I went over the basics with them and how it would all work, but... I don't know. I accepted with the idea if I did, I'd be doing it on a temporary basis for this project and that I would be able to find somebody I'm looking for. Apparently they'd been planning retirement for a little while and I didn't know. I guess they also thought the healing center angels would be available to answer questions, but... obviously their communication was down, so I was never told about them. And Heaven and Hell haven't interacted in centuries, just because they stick to their own domains, so nobody thought we would have to deal with that either.

So yeah. I guess I just didn't get a chance to ask for things I didn't think I would have to ask, including "hey, are you going to come back?"

I've tried reaching out to them multiple times since this started. I've got nothing. [ he really was just left on his own when this started. ]
obdure: (pic#17647813)

[personal profile] obdure 2025-04-04 04:58 am (UTC)(link)
... I at least had an experienced advisor when I started as lord.

[ He's implying that Jonas was given a shitshow. ]
sixam: (It doesn't matter)

[personal profile] sixam 2025-04-04 06:07 am (UTC)(link)
[ he knows... he knows. ]

... the Angels have been a huge help. Even if they aren't from here, their different skills have been helpful with figuring stuff out.