[ person seems right. it's not like anders had a label for it either, it's not like they were allowed to define anything. ]
We managed to get a few letters through, but ... not exactly. [ oof. but he seems okay. steady, talking about it for the moment anyway. ] He was already gone by the time I saw him again. We hadn't been together for a long time by then, though.
Just because you haven't seen someone in a long time doesn't mean you can't still miss them. [ it's a little quiet, but: ] Gone as in... he'd left, right? Not... Dead?
[ honestly the way she asks this makes him want to lie. it just strikes him that maybe she's lost a lot in her life already, and maybe one bittersweet ending is better than the brutal one it really is.
but justice is no good at lying. in fact, he can't do it. anders can lie, obfuscate the truth, but he never lasts long. he's not good at it. ]
He was made Tranquil. And he did not wish to live like that, so ...
Yeah. No kidding. One of. Just the way they treated you without that was bad enough. That circle thing is--[ she stops herself, and then decides that she has no reason to stop herself: ] It's fucked.
[ luckily for gamaliel's repeating ass memshares are here! there's a two minute bit where she is not present but i'm leaving it in for context so here until 28:40 ]
[ there's a great deal of this that is completely unfamiliar and disorienting, but-- he can get enough context to understand. even a magically summoned image of her father is something he can get his head around, he's seen similar types of images, memories imprinted. but.
[ in her case there's a kind of distant pain in her face, which is maybe impressive because she looks exactly the same as when it happened in the memory, wow! ]
Yes. [ she is aware anders is missing so much context, so; ] Before he died the first time, when he was sick, he used technology to do something that's like... putting your soul in a different realm. That's what you saw.
Hawke's father once did something similar enough. Leaving an echo of yourself, a spirit that reflects your presence, is something magic can do.
[ so this makes sense to him. he was sick and wanted a piece of himself to remain. it's not ... really you. it's a spirit or some impression of magic, remembering you. in some senses mimicking you - not necessarily with ill intentions. it's close enough for some. ]
I'm sorry.
[ he's not always good at comfort. but reaching a hand out like he's going to put it on her shoulder before he questions himself. ]
To lose a parent is hard enough. To witness it twice is cruelty.
[ she looks at his hand and doesn't seem bothered by his hesitance or by his wish for comfort, but when she says thrice it's said like that's not completely insane ]
At that time, that was the third time. [ she has her own hands behind her back, folded carefully ] It's not quite like an echo. It's them as they are. My dad did it the first time, and they told my mom it failed. It didn't. They were using him to work for them. He broke away, and--things happened. There were issues. He died again. But they'd kept a backup. A copy. And we thought maybe we could fix the issues, and then--
[ gestures helplessly at the mirrors because sometimes the plot of your canon is capitalism is bad actually ]
He is. [ and this isn't like, quite the same, because it's not like her dad spent his entire life like it, but. ] Sometimes death's the only alternative.
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[ person seems right. it's not like anders had a label for it either, it's not like they were allowed to define anything. ]
We managed to get a few letters through, but ... not exactly. [ oof. but he seems okay. steady, talking about it for the moment anyway. ] He was already gone by the time I saw him again. We hadn't been together for a long time by then, though.
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but justice is no good at lying. in fact, he can't do it. anders can lie, obfuscate the truth, but he never lasts long. he's not good at it. ]
He was made Tranquil. And he did not wish to live like that, so ...
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[ that it happened and that she asked, especially since she can guess what tranquil means from the memories she just saw ]
At least you didn't let him stay like that. It's better than the alternative.
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[ but ... ]
The Rite of Tranquility of one of the reasons the Circle must be broken. It should never be used on another mage ever again.
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[ yea. ]
It's fucked.
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[ luckily for gamaliel's repeating ass memshares are here! there's a two minute bit where she is not present but i'm leaving it in for context so here until 28:40 ]
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that was horrible to watch. ]
... Your father?
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Yes. [ she is aware anders is missing so much context, so; ] Before he died the first time, when he was sick, he used technology to do something that's like... putting your soul in a different realm. That's what you saw.
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Hawke's father once did something similar enough. Leaving an echo of yourself, a spirit that reflects your presence, is something magic can do.
[ so this makes sense to him. he was sick and wanted a piece of himself to remain. it's not ... really you. it's a spirit or some impression of magic, remembering you. in some senses mimicking you - not necessarily with ill intentions. it's close enough for some. ]
I'm sorry.
[ he's not always good at comfort. but reaching a hand out like he's going to put it on her shoulder before he questions himself. ]
To lose a parent is hard enough. To witness it twice is cruelty.
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[ she looks at his hand and doesn't seem bothered by his hesitance or by his wish for comfort, but when she says thrice it's said like that's not completely insane ]
At that time, that was the third time. [ she has her own hands behind her back, folded carefully ] It's not quite like an echo. It's them as they are. My dad did it the first time, and they told my mom it failed. It didn't. They were using him to work for them. He broke away, and--things happened. There were issues. He died again. But they'd kept a backup. A copy. And we thought maybe we could fix the issues, and then--
[ gestures helplessly at the mirrors because sometimes the plot of your canon is capitalism is bad actually ]
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CHRISTANDRASTE ALIVE ]... At the very least, he is free now.
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